The Usual Existential Cynicism

The minor emotional confusion that characterizes my life continues. Right now nothing seems worthwhile, or even causally effective, even as I cannot shake off the sense of agency, control, or intention with which I am imbued. Thus everything I do or fail to do is experienced as a decision, and I cannot understand why I… Continue reading The Usual Existential Cynicism

Portland Evening, February 2012

Waiting for the drugs to take effect The type of music you hear in these places. Living in a hip city there are seventeen of these places within a ten-block radius. A female crooner, scratch-edged voice, drum-n-bass beat behind a soulful sad tune turning quickly to a lusty howl. A dark room candlelit with voices… Continue reading Portland Evening, February 2012

Wonderful Treasures

My other self is a notebook. My journal is my therapist, my audience, my teacher, my mirror. It is my way of understanding everything, the repository of all my considered thoughts: a version of me, abstracted from the full physicality of me, not an argument but an ongoing processing of arguments, backward looking but forward-moving.… Continue reading Wonderful Treasures